i'm sorry Tuesday

it just dawned on me...

when i just turned 21, my friends and i went to the album launch of Session Road in Xaymaca, Timog. at the end of the band's last set that night, some of the members joined us in our table (i've got friends who are friends of the band also, that's why). Coy, Tuesday Vargas' now live-in partner sat next to me. he started talking with me, from admiring the top i was wearing, 'til my friends blurted out my being a virgin. maybe, it appeared interesting to him, he told me that he can get someone i can have sex with for a sum of money. and i told him that the idea is off. amidst all my shying away, he offered himself.

Coy: Ako na lng.
Me: Silent and shy.
Coy: Cgeh, ako na lang. pag 23 ka na tas virgin ka pa rin, ako na lang.
Me: An tagal naman nun.
Coy: Just looking at me and smiling.

i don't remember how that conversation ended, but, as he left the table, i said to myself that by the time i turn 23, i don't think i'd still be virginal. that was still 2 years then.

in a few months, i'd be turning 23. and i *in a whisper still haven't engaged into a sexual relationship. if he's serious about what he said, then i myt forcibly get into the act come october. and if he really really is serious about that, perhaps, i'd make sure not to lose it until then...on him.

too bad that i know, he didn't mean what he offered.

of course.