UrAWriterNotALover

for the past two weeks, i was trying to get back in shape to writing. i made several attempts. but, to no avail. everything dropped into my drafts unfinished. in most, i was successful with finishing a complete sentence. and that was the best that i could make. sometimes, i had beer in hopes that it would do its magic to me. i had coffee and lots of yosi to give me that writer-effect. but, i always ended up just staring blankly drowned into the silence of the night and to the chaos of my thoughts. raining didn't help. it only made me even more drifted away from focus.

several times, my friends called me insane. and when i asked them if they were serious, they were. and it got me thinking, that maybe, i was really acting strange lately. how strange? strange enough that made them buzz saying that am not being myself. and they just know me too well.

the slap was painful. because, i know that at this point in my life, i am a writer. but, my blog remained inactive. i was asked to write about the Caribbean as a sample article for a chance to be hired and make writing as a career. but, after reading a lot about the Caribbean, my mind seemed numb of ideas. it was painful, because i know that i am a writer.

and what i have been doing? where i have been going? why wasn't i writing? i fell. into something virtual. where the emotions are just as real. and i won't elaborate on that. not yet. maybe, not ever. you just have to understand that you may not understand. i am a lover.

and what's important right now is that i am able to publish a new entry. and maybe it's a sign that i am getting back in shape. i am having a fresh start with the effort of reconciling the worlds am in. because maybe, i can be both.

A Lover and A Writer.